Jeanie Bottle 701
I love how the second guy is just not even paying attention to his new girl-friend’s complaints. Though to be fair, that IS enough money to sit on it like a throne, so I can empathize.
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Well, his wish was very literal.
Green shirt is forgetting the wisdom of the Fabulous Furry Freak Bros. “Dope will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no dope.” 🙂
A girl friend is not the same as a girlfriend.
That’s Jeanie fulfilling their wishes via her own interpretation. Genies are famous for that. 🙂
She can’t mess with free will. Thus any “girlfriend” must already be a friend. And that is why I said a girl friend is not a girlfriend. He was imprecise in his wording since she was free to take “girlfriend” and interpret it as “girl friend”.
> She can’t mess with free will.
Actually, no. I’ve been slowly going through the archive and updating the old pages with upscaled versions, and I just hit the page where Kazom explains that “Free Will” rule to Jeanie. The actual rule is that “Genies can’t impose their will upon a human.” But that’s *not* what’s happening when a master makes a wish upon their genie: it’s the master who is imposing their own will.
That said, whether or not this particular situation would allow that loophole to apply, given that Green Shirt didn’t specifically say “I wish for you turn to Red Shirt into my girlfriend”, would be up for debate.
And Jeanie might have run up against the limits harder had Green Shirt’s wish been something like “…and a super hot, devoted girlfriend”… or Green shirt might have found his/herself compliant arm candy, along the same lines as the Greek captain.
Au Contraire: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/LiteralGenie
Girl Friend with benefits?
Could be worse your boyfriend could have forgotten to wish for a million dollars and a car. Next time don’t try to drill a hole in a genie bottle.
And then expect the genie to grant you wishes fairly.
I think the issue might be less the drill a hole in the bottle and more the “I wish for a million more wishes” when she’s already annoyed at you. That kind of stuff goes badly when the genie likes you. Wishing for it when the genie doesn’t she’s lucky she’s not in the same boat as the greek captain only focused on one guy rather than any cute one who comes by.
New Girl: “You can’t leave me like this!”
Red and Anne, at the distances: “What’s this feeling of kinship?”
Hahahaha!
Don’t forget the very rich Greek Captain, Georgiana.
Or her daughter.
I mildly doubt Jeanie could make new people from nothing to make a girlfriend, so probably the closest she could do in order to comply to begin with.
A fair point. I think her explanation jives with that very well.
Especially since she knows that even attempting to mess with a human’s free will is potentially dangerous for her (see the Melvin arc), so she’d try to come up with the best possible way to fulfill his wish without doing so.
My thoughts exactly. Even if she created a new human being, she couldn’t mess with her feelings either.
Now, about the huge stack of money, those could all be 1-dollar bills, or they could be all with the same banknote number making them even more worthless.
But blue showed it ‘is’ possible to influence emotions. Remember when he made Neil as Natalie feel … strongly about Rodge? The Greek captains brain also goes to mush… so hormonal/instinct influence seems possible.
With a stack that big, even singles would amount to a couple hundred grand. If they are twenties or higher, then he has enough to live a middle class lifestyle for the rest of his life without ever having to work again. If on the other hand, he tries to live it up like the elite, then he’ll probably run through it within a couple of years.
If they are any current, legal, US currency, that stack is worth a lot.
Stacked and bundled tightly, it’s more than 200 bills per inch of height (each is 0.0043” thick). A tall stack will, by its own weight, press the bottom bills fairly tight, but even with singles, at a low estimate of 100 wrinkled bills per inch, a 3’ high stack would be $3600.
In surface area, there’s about 9 bills per square foot. If the pile (now throne) is 3’x3’, it’s 9 sq-ft, and made up of about 80 stacks.
So, a 3x3x3’ cube of singles will be — round numbers — $290,000.
Anything larger than singles in US currency will be over a million, and could be up to around 29 million.
@Guardingdark Yeah, I do think it’d be possible for Jeanie to actually do what Moron #2 wished for. Turn Moron #1 into a babe, then mind-whammie her like she did to Natalie, making Hot Babe #1 super attracted to Rich Moron #2.
Apparently “screwing with neurotransmitters” doesn’t violate the genie rules against messing with free will. I guess Hot Babe #1 is lucky Jeanie didn’t decide to do that.
Whenever I have to explain road construction costs I tell people that one million standard U.S. bills is approximately one cubic yard of paper, or one cubic meter. It’s actually 3.4 yards but construction people used to working with dirt can easily visualize a cubic yard. One million $1 bills it would be “a lot of money” in volume but wouldn’t have the buying power it did when being a millionaire actually meant something.
There is also the possibility that she granted the wish for money in a way that makes it completely useless to him. The US Mint printed $100,000 bills from 12/18/34 to 1/9/35; they were used for transfers between Federal Reserve banks before electronic transfers replaced physical transfer of currency, and are illegal for private citizens to own; that pile would be more $100,000 bills than the Mint ever printed, and would get him in serious trouble if he tried to utter one. Or stepping down to the $10,000 bill, the largest ever printed for public consumption — only a few hundred examples are still known to exist, so while he wouldn’t be prosecuted just for possessing them, he’d wind up under a huge amount of scrutiny for having them, particularly if how many he had came to light.
I just figured that they were Confederate. Or Monopoly.
Reminds me of the Breaking Bad scene.
https://youtu.be/zXH6fhueO3I
It could also be monopoly money. Or have her face on it. Totaly fake.
Now Mr Suddenly Rich is going to have to explain all of this money, that Jeanie might have made all with the same serial numbers to the authorities.
Indeed, he should “Look at all this money.” Look very carefully. It may be that the safest thing to do with it is use it for kindling. Alas, not much need for kindling in Florida.
Then again, it may be valid currency, in which case the kindling option would be unlawful.
Either way, don’t make any decisions about it while you’re on whatever, you need to be sober for this.
Or she could POOF a letter to the IRS suggesting that they check into Joe Greenshirt’s finances. He never paid any income tax on that huge pile of money he just got, and the IRS frowns on that.
That way she gives him real money, but she makes it really hard for him to spend it. Without getting busted, that is.
@Ellie: Why would she make the effort? She granted his wish, and any repercussions are his own problem. If he’s clever (not really likely) he’ll spend it slowly and carefully. If he’s stupid he’ll run out and buy a McMansion and pay the bank in cash and have the IRS at his door within 24 hours. Jeanie doesn’t need to do a thing.
Jean going for word-play garbage? That is hot BS. It’s also the most low hanging fruit of any genie. Human language is imprecise because it’s had to grow organically as culture and civilization has changed and grown. The word ‘villain’ does not mean what it did 2000 years ago. (It mean someone who worked at a villa.) A five year old could misinterpret what their parents says to their advantage! It’s why lawyers are paid so obscenely well, and why contracts run miles long. There’s nothing, clever, funny, or amusing about it. It’s just being a brat, and Genies act like they’re the epitome of wit for it.
No, sure, Jeannie should have created a whole new human being from nothing, and made her a dedicated girlfriend to the guy with the fake money (who should have wished for a stack of gold bars sitting on the ground in front of him).
When granting the wishes to the exact intent of the person stating the wish is an extra effort even more difficult than twisting it, then I’d have no mercy either.
And side note, your mention of how the word villa means different things today than 2000 years ago, has nothing to do with the matter, does it? Nobody here wished for a villa, and nothing in the wishes hinged on language shifts. I do agree that these unfortunate wishers should have thought like lawyers.
My mistake. I meant to include the words ‘for example’, as well, an example of how words change, and how easy it is to purpose misinterpret nearly any statement.
Sophistry and word play are intrinsic to the “be careful what you wish for” nature of the classic three wish story. Did you notice that “T” agrees with you about this being bullshit?
Except it isn’t. If someone’s wish is foolish or childish, then the natural consequences should be enough. Wish for a pony? But didn’t think of the cost to FEED IT and clean up after it, enough open space for it to remain sane, etc. Relying on semantics to do your work for you is lazy.
I agree with Onyavar.
Considering how easy she could have twisted the wishes, this was actually pretty faithful, and congruent with his intentions.
Yes first guy didn’t get the million wishes but that was against the rules and he lost his third wish trying to be cleaver. But second guy got what he wanted.
She can’t just “make” him a girlfriend out of nothing, she is a djinn not a god, the best she could do was to take someone who was his friend, and make him a girl. And may I point out a heterosexual girl. She properly wont realise that at once, because female attractiveness works differently then mens.
Women are less visual and attracted to status much more then physical characteristics. But I am sure she will be disappointed once she opens one of her old porn magazines and realise that it does nothing for her now.
To be fair, wordplay is usually the only recourse of bottle genies against jerkasses and abusive masters. Of course they are going to exploit language as far as they can.
A throne of money could be very useful. You’d never run short of toilet paper.
Rule 1 with genies: Always be as specific as possible. Vague wishes will lead to all sorts of trouble. XD
My, she is fierce, and beautiful when she’s angry!
Indeed. And Jeanie (CD) made an excellent choice on her hair. Wild and lush, not the usual ponytail.
Jeanie dollars. They are worth 5 British pounds. For that is the exchange rate the Bank of England will give her once she’s TG’d their king.
In light of recent news, 5 British pounds are not a too reassuring value, but the Bank of England rewarding Jeannie for returning a Queen to the monarchy sounds at least plausible.
it seems to me this is a little punishment for the whole million wishes thing.
Yup, panel number 1, she had to peek to make sure they were real. Green shirt-take your new girl to the beach and go bikini shopping. You can afford it now.
Let me try to summarize the possible problems with the money:
A. It’s monopoly money (or from The Game of Life, or something; same general idea).
B. It’s stolen.
C. It’s counterfeit.
D. It’s low denomination (e.g. $1 each), and not worth much (though as others have pointed out, a stack that big could have a million one-dollar bills).
E. It’s low-value foreign money – the cheapest option I can find is 25-Guinean Franc banknotes, and a million of those would come to $2871.91 according to Google.
F. It’s diseased/poisoned.
G. It’s cursed somehow.
H. They’re all temporally displaced copies of one bill, and spending any of them will cause the universe to implode.
A combination of several of the above is also possible, but let’s see if anyone can come up with more options.
The fact that Green Shirt doesn’t notice anything amiss about the money implies that it looks genuine at first glance, even if it won’t hold up to professional scrutiny.
How about U.S. currency, but with HIS picture on it instead of Washington, Lincoln, Jackson, or whomever. Also, remember that restaurant that got put out of business because Neil paid with a dollar bill with a futuristic date? Jeanie could give him money dated 2032.
It looks real; who looks at the date on a dollar bill, but it can’t be legally spent for ten years. WHat does he do with it till then? It takes up a lot of space.
Wait, why does this money say Confederate States of America?
If it is real it is worth a lot as a collector item.
Actually, no; the Confederacy printed bills by the millions, and many of them are still around.
1) A new installment already? Thanks!
2) Checking what’s added rather than what’s removed, due to the Comic Code Authority.
3) CD… Please also make her SUPER! It was in the wish!
4) Those are official US currency $1 bills. Straight from the Bureau of Engraving and Printing!
> 3) CD… Please also make her SUPER! It was in the wish!
I mean, I’d say she’s “super hot”. So Jeanie fulfilled the wish just fine. 🙂
Who’s with me?
{ } Super Hot
{X} Hot and Super
So, what’s he going to say when the IRS and FBI ask where he got all the loot?? LOL
Just a thought. How many bedrooms does Neil’s house have?
Good question.
At the beginning of the Timey Wimey arc, an exterior view suggested that it’s a single-story duplex with no windows to indicate that there’s a basement. All three stoners entered this arc from inside the home, which would suggest that there are least 3 bedrooms (I doubt there would be 4 without a basement or second story).
My guess is that orange shirt has 1 bedroom (he arrived separately) and the other two share the third, which is convenient since now they are a couple.
More importantly (at least for red shirt) … did Jeanie change all her old clothing along with what she’s wearing now? Not that green shirt can’t afford to buy her a whole new wardrobe.
I think it would be very funny if she’s as much of a clothes horse as Jeannie. 🙂 They could get into arguments about it.
Tammy: You know those harem pants have always made your ass look huge!
Jeannie: You know what really makes your ass look huge? Magic!
@Joyce: Jeanie doesn’t need a closet since she can just poof up whatever she wants. Red Shirt (she really does need a name) will need all the closet space Green Shirt can spare… and my guess is that it will be all of it. Of course, Green Shirt has the cash to get his own place today and if he’s smart (no guarantee about that) he’ll do it.
I wonder how long it’s going to take red shirt girl to realize that as green shirt’s girlfriend, she’s got a willing sugar daddy?
Very good point!
Well, she is hot. In fact, she’s pissed as hell. 🙂
Love the Jean MCU Scarlet Witch banner.
Thanks
It is cool, CD. 🙂
She has to race a teleporting Genie to Orange Shirt Guy before he makes his third wish
to get untransformed.
If only she could fly over to where he is. (Hint!)
Jean was generous, she could have created a stack of Monopoly Money rather than real money
hell, those could $1 bills!